Eek! Boobies In My Mail!

Lately I've been getting a bunch of unwelcome mailings trying to sell me porn. Not that I have anything against ads for porn. I actually enjoy getting them, because once you get inside the second envelope there's usually some hot pix of cute dudes or buff stallions inside, all free of charge to look at. Some of it's not particularly to my tastes, but I'm open-minded and polymorphically perverse enough to enjoy casually paging through a brochure of (for example) furry guys in leather masks pissing on each other.

What bugs me is that I've started getting mailings for hetero porn. Most of which, when you blindly open the inside envelope, is all boobs boobs twats boobs boobs, with scarcely a dick or even a firm chest in sight. Using these images in their mailings makes sense for the market they're aiming for... but they've missed that mark here.

Obviously I've gotten onto the "wrong" mailing list. As near as I can figure, it happened when I bought a deep-discount DVD advertised in a gay-oriented mailing I received from a pornographer who mostly deals in het movies. A pat on the back to him for being open-minded and willing to take the money of us cocksuckers as well as from his fellow muffmunchers. I don't mind doing business with folks like him on those terms. But from now on, I'm going to stick to buying my smut from folks (presumably gay folks, but that's not really the point) who specialize in gay smut, so that when they sell or trade their mailing lists, my address won't fall into the wrong hands.